Let’s Be Clear

When people talk to me, at first glance, it seems like I have a rather…stoic view of love. I tend to talk about it as if it’s simply another thing that one experiences in life, not to be taken seriously. I will admit that I subconsciously discuss the topic with a bit of sarcasm and even come off as detached, entirely.

It’s funny because when I look back at posts, within a post I’ll go from sarky and  dismissive to this person with actual feelings…and I’ll throw even myself off.

The thing is, I feel like I need to be detached in order to find out what I’m really looking for. I’m not entirely sure where this blog is going. But I want to make one thing perfectly clear: most of the things that I write on this blog isn’t just for the readers who decide to actually take what I have to say and use it in their lives. It’s also for me to remind myself of things that I tend to forget.

Sometimes, I get scared that I won’t be able to find lasting love. For me, love is an extremely beautiful thing, and my biggest fear is that I won’t be able to share it with someone for the rest of my life. I think that it’s possible to fall in and out of love, and I’ve been there and done that.

I’m an emotional being. Sometimes my instincts aren’t always right; they get blinded and victimized simply by emotion. And I understand that that can be risky.

I think that while love is indeed beautiful, it can be incredibly dangerous, and if you aren’t careful, you can lose yourself in it. I’ve been here, too. I think that the absolute worst kind of hurt is the kind that derives from love, and it’s a hurt that I wish on no one…though ultimately it’s inevitable. I’ve been on both the giving and receiving end of this hurt. I’ve been both the hopeless romantic, and the relentless siren.

So, if you get a laugh out of my burlesquing, then I’m glad I can entertain you. I get that a lot. If you think that I make a mockery of the topic, well I’m sorry. I’m only doing what I can for myself. I feel like this is a way to channel the way that I feel and the things that I experience in a healthy way, and if I help someone else out in the process, then I’m more than satisfied.


~ by musingsofaboredteenager on July 8, 2012.

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